Photograph by Lorenzo Hodges
So many things have happened there—I’ve had many birthdays and sober birthdays there and I asked my wife Ashley to marry me there. That was a big day. It was my 50th birthday, and instead of focusing on the fact that I was 50, which is a nightmare, in my mind it was the day we got engaged. When we go there, I can eat about 12 of those chicken satays.
L.A. Kings Games
They won the last 20 games I went to. I wore the same black T-shirt and jeans, same boots, same jacket, same underwear, same watch—everything—all the way through the finals. They thanked me big time. At the players’ party after, Kyle Clifford gave me a black eye. He was hugging me hard to take a picture and hit me in the eye. It was the biggest honor.
The Polo Lounge
I live pretty close to there now, and if you go there you tend to get to know the people who work there. I’ve been to so many functions there—I may have had a wedding there or something, I can’t remember. But when you grow up in Iowa, L.A. you see a place like that and think, Would I ever be able to visit there? The Polo Lounge gives me the illusion that I’m involved in something.
Beverly Glen Deli
They have a big variety, but I always order Sue’s turkey melt. It gives you the illusion it’s fairly healthy, but then you have steak fries with it to balance that out. They have great steak fries.
It’s the only place in L.A. that I have found that has loose meat sandwiches, which are super popular in Iowa, where I’m from. It’s like a Sloppy Joe without the slop. One time I ate 12 Coney Dogs because Dax Shepard said he would have a bronze bust made and put it in his house of anybody who could eat ten. So I did that. He still hasn’t done the bronze, but maybe this will encourage him.
Rochester Big and Tall
Recently I had to do the Walk of Shame, which is walking into Rochester Big and Tall, because I needed a suit that actually fit. They do have nice stuff, but you go there when you’ve crossed the line and can’t fit into Armani anymore. Last night I said to my wife, ‘Hey, let’s go down there and get another suit.’ She said, ‘No way, you’re going on a diet.’
I go up the steps and then walk down, so I do the hard part first. Once you turn 50 you’ve got to do a lot of stuff to prove you’re still a man; I got a motorcycle and ride it there. I came back down once and the motorcycle was kind of cockeyed. It’s so heavy I was having trouble turning it around, and these two young guys with no shirts on—one of them was literally Adonis—they recognized me or whatever and pushed my bike up in front of my wife. It was much appreciated. I’d still be there otherwise. It’s a heavy bike! But if it was all super fit people there, I would definitely not go.
The Rock Store
It’s a famous place up off PCH. You go there and see 100 bikes parked out front. It’s good food, it comes fast, and then you ride back down. It’s a really nice thing to do on an early Saturday or Sunday morning.
AMC Century City 15
When I’m not working I tend to isolate, and then I make myself go to the AMC Century City because that requires putting on a shirt, parking the car, and walking through people—it’s an adventure and it’s good psychologically for me. The last movie we saw there was Moonrise Kingdom. I liked it a lot.
Jerry’s Famous Deli
They have the best carrot cake in the world. I like nuts in my carrot cake and I like frosting, and I like a lot of it.
Photographs courtesy (in order): (1) mjt.org, (2) spicestationsilverlake.com, (3) shorttermhousing.com, (4) thetrailslosfeliz.com, (5) hollywoodsign.org, (6) cafegratitudela.com, (7) theosophical.org, (8) losangeles.ucbtheatre.com