The New “Cheaper” Whole Foods Blueprints Are Here, and We’re Bored

We were promised a tattoo parlor IN STORE, damnit #dreamsdashed

Despite the news that 365 by Whole Foods Market will be a (supposedly more affordable) Millennial-facing amusement park complete with a craft beer and coffee bar, a vegan restaurant, and a futuristic tea robot, if you look at the official renderings, it appears that it will, in fact, look shockingly similar to a grocery store. You know, the places you go to buy food.

That said, the images also show a stark contrast between 365 and its scaled-up predecessor. There’s no more sprawling olive bar, the artisanal cheese case is nowhere to be seen, and neither are the pizza and sandwich stations that will suck $13 out of your pocket like its no one’s business. The layout seems more user-friendly and navigable too—notice the absence of towering shelves. Also, how satisfying would it be to race shopping carts around in those wide-open spaces? (Though the gaps will soon be filled with Silver Lake residents fighting over who gets the last bottle of fair-trade almond butter.)

If we’re being honest here, it’s all just slightly disappointing. With all the tattoo parlor and Millennial talk from corporate, I was imagining more of a Hot-Topic-with-organic-persimmons vibe.