10 Places Rob Ford Should Check the Next Time He’s in L.A.

Crack not included

Have you heard? Toronto’s (alleged) crack-smoking mayor Rob Ford was just in L.A. making the rounds. He stopped at City Hall and taped a spot on Jimmy Kimmel’s show. But a man like Ford must like to get out from time to time. Here’s a list of places that may just be up his alley, from scandalous nightclubs to late-night dives, our city has it all.*

King Eddy’s: An L.A. institution at the doorstep of Skid Row where Rob can blend in with the crowd and buy rounds of Jack Daniels for all his new buddies.

Hakkasan Beverly Hills: Perhaps he’d like to rub elbows with our hometown whales in a Vegas-like setting?

The Penthouse at Mastro’s: All the mayors are doing it. They’ve got porterhouse steak, they’ve got vodka.

P’tit Soleil: Maybe he’d like a comforting taste of home? This Westwood spot offers a poutine bar, poutine flights, and Canadian specialty cocktails.

L.A. Market: Ford is a big fan of desserts (as evidenced by his going to town on Jimmy Kimmel’s green room desserts), so he’d probably love chef Kerry Simon’s junk food platter with red velvet whoopie pie, Snickers cake, and baby churros. Maybe they’ll rename it the “Rob Ford special”?

Honeycut: Imagine Ford getting down on that dance floor. And he’d love the cocktails—on tap for immediate liquid satisfaction.

Hooray Henry’s: If Rob wants to roll big at this London-inspired nightclub, he can order up the $50K King Package which gets him two Grey Goose Magnums, several bottles of Ace of Spades and a caricature on their wall, extending his 15 minutes.

Max Karaoke Studio: Since he enjoys singing and dancing during city council meetings he’d love this karaoke spot where he can take command of the mic a la Bob Marley late into the night (til 4 a.m. on Fridays and Saturdays). Bonus, he could bring his own food and (nonalcoholic) drinks.

Jumbo’s Clown Room: At the end of the night, all roads lead to Jumbo’s.

Sunny Spot: With his flair for patois, we figure Rob would be down for some tasty Caribbean fare courtesy of L.A.’s munchies expert Roy Choi. Plus? This Marina Del Rey spot has a killer bottomless brunch—ideal for the morning after.


* Just in case: High Times in L.A.