Everything you need to know from a sampling of today’s front page
Rick Perry Compares Himself to Tim Tebow During Debate
His Hail Mary is an actual football reference. First down!
Barry Bonds Sentenced to House Arrest
He’ll be home for Christmas.
6 Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac Execs Charged With Fraud
They could be forced to pay fines and penalties. And you thought everybody involved in the collapse of our economy was going to get off scot-free.
Vladimir Putin Plastic Surgery Rumors Swirl
He’s “looking less stressed these days.” Curious!
Britney Spears is Engaged
It’s Britney and Jason forever, bitch!
Christopher Hitchens Dies at 62.