Gird your loins. Prince of snark Simon Cowell is coming to town, and he definitely knows if you've been bad or good.
The X Factor will hold open auditions for Season Three next week at USC's Galen Center. The Fox singing competition try-outs will visit five U.S. cities this spring: Denver, New Orleans, Charleston, Long Island, and L.A. Cowell's fellow Season Two judges included Britney Spears, L.A. Reid, and Demi Lovato.
Want to waltz in on your lunch break and give it a whirl? Please. This is serious business. Contenders, take note: Wristbands will be distributed starting at 8 a.m. on Monday morning with actual auditions happening on Wednesday, March 6. You are strongly encouraged to pre-register, and overnight squatting is definitely not allowed. Step away from that campfire.
According to the site's FAQs, once you get your golden ticket, DON'T TAKE IT OFF. Seriously. Don't even shower. Removing it makes it null and void throwing you to the back of the line, where we're pretty sure you'll languish in obscurity and/or get assigned to iron Cowell's t-shirts -- unless he happens to peruse the hall and pluck you from obscurity on the basis of your, ahem, looks and personality, which is apparently a thing that happens when time is running short.
If things don't go your way, chin up. Southwest still has some good deals to Denver. Click here for all the audition rules.